Reggie's new hair cut :)

So I finally broke down tonight and emailed several Dentists about the tooth I broke about 2 years back. I've babied it but have still managed to get a sever cavity in the tooth. I just feel so worthless for asking for charity from anyone like that. Well I guess it really isn't' charity. I offered to work in the office as payment. I'd try a payment plan if we could afford it but with both of us still out of work that's nearly impossible. I don't even know how we've managed to pull through the last few months. We wouldn't' be married right now if my mother hadn't stepped in and helped us out in the end. I'd just deal with it until we found something but the pain has gotten to the point where it hurts to swallow. I may just end up having it pulled. It will look funny since its my left bottom canine but I can manage looking silly just as long as the pain stops.

I keep getting discouraged. Every time we think we'll pull out on top something gets pulled out from under us. I feel as though I'm cursed. We finally got out of the nasty apartments and into a nice house only to have Reggie lose his job. I got the job of my dreams and just when I was starting to enjoy it and get good at it, it ends. And now every time we think that something just might go our way, everything goes to hell in a hand basket. I don't' know what to do really. I'd ask for help from the church but I'd feel horrible since I haven't been in so long. I need to start going again. I know I do but its so hard when you know that you need to save every last drop of gas for Reggie in case he gets that interveiw or incase I get called for a babysitting job or interview and the church is so far away. I really just feel like I've been abandoned. I know he's suposed to challenge us here on earth but at one point isn't it suposed to get better? Aren't you suposed to earn some time when the challenges aren't so burdoning? I'm at my wits end. I'm crying again when I should be happy that I'm with the most wonderful man god could allow me to have. And just when I think that blessing will pull me through something else goes wrong. I'd like to say atleast it can't get worse but I know it can. I had a control on my depression and ever since I lost my job in october I keep slipping further and further and I find it harder to bring myself back up. I feel so lost.

I apologize for putting this out there for all of you to read but I needed to get this off my chest.

March 20-21, 2009

A picture of our rings taken by my father in law.

A picture of us with our mothers. Joyce, Reggie, Me and Teresa

A picture of us. Now how did we manage to both close our eyes LOL

One of my favorite pictures of us.

 

4DAYS!!!!!!!

6 days!!!!!!!!

The blues and the uppers

Well Reggie and I are getting married in less than two weeks. I'm very excited but bumbed at the same time. I am one of those people who wants everyone to be happy and its hard when you can't please everyone. My mom is throwing Reggie and I something up at her place; however, about 20 people down here won't be able to make it up there and I knew that from the start of things. Reggie and I had planned on doing something down here but alas one bad thing after another seems to be happening and now we don't have the money to feed 20 people. Then i thought we could do a dinner and have people pay their way and go someplace simple and cheapish like golden corral. And yes I know its like only 10 dollars a person but with the way things are right now, I dont' think Reggie and I could even afford that. It just really stinks that we can't have something going on down here for his side of the family. We'll probably have dinner at his parents house for his two best friends my two best friends and my mom after the wedding but it still stinks. :(

On the upside, a lot of friends that I haven't seen since highschool will be there and my best friend is flying in from Utah to spend the weekend and the first part of the week with us. I wish she could have stayed out her longer than 5 days but timing just really sucks. But atleast she'll be here that is all that matters.

Reggie still hasn't found a job. He had an interview that was promising but they never called him back and he hasn't heard anything from anywhere else that he's applied. It really is upsetting but I know somewhere in my heart that something will come up soon enough. I also haven't heard anything from anywhere and it seems like the bills keep stacking up. I really hope that Reggie and I will make it through. Its putting a lot of strain on us.

Thats about it for the news. I'll probably be Mrs. Kincaid next time I sit down to blog. I'm bad abou that. Laters

In game related news, we managed to clear a Raid. That was pretty impressive for us this week. my toon on the game is so well geared it sucks that we probably won't be raiding again for a while :(